ive been writing my daydreams over the past two days.  i thought they were quite...  interesting.  i wanted to share them with all of you.  do you understand?  well, its kinda cool how i daydream somethings.  this was quite an inapropriate daydream.  a loooong one too.  this is just part of the daydream.  the part i wanted to make a story or a movie out of.  story first, movie when i get a camera.  [im soo poor].  well, here it is...

[scrawny boys are soooooooo sex]

his hands, white knuckled, on either side of her head, supporting half his weight, his eyes on her mouth.  she wasa biting her bottom lip, eyes closed.  had her eyes been open they'd be, as they say, 'up towards the heavens'.  he wondered if he was hurting her.  her expression was so that he could not decifer whether if reflected pain or pleasure.  he slowed his motion, so captured by the beauty in her lips, losing all intrest in everything else.  she opened her eyes just enough to see his face.
"is everything ok?" she asked.  he had stopped completely now, as if under a spell.  she said his name, now, and he blinked as if awakening from a daydream.  "is everything ok?" she asked again.
"yeah, yeah, im...  fine.  im...  im sorry.  i-"
"do you wanna...  take a break maybe?"  she felt sort of uncomfortable with his body language now.  he seemed to feel as if he'd been caught in the act of something he thought was beyond even him.
"uh...  yeah, yeah, maybe...  we should."  he pushed himself up from over her and walked over to the chair his jeans had been thrown over.  she rolled onto her side and opened a pack of ciggarettes, placing one between her lips and lighting it.  she turned her head and watched him put his jeans back on.  this made her feel unnecessarily naked, so she pulled her sheet up to her shulders, never taking her eyes off him, his back to her.  he held himself up with his hands on the back of the chair, staring blankly into space.  it went like this for a few minutes.  she had completely forgotten about her ciggarette until the ashes fell on her hand and burned her.  she brushed the ashes off and put her ciggarette out.
"griffen, are you ok?"  he turned to look at her only to turn back away.
"yeah, im fine.  i should go."  he grabbed his shirt and left.  she could hear his steps all the way down the stairs and out the door.  she rolled on to her back again. and sighed.

what the fuck is wrong?

ok, this thing is really nothing.  but thats ok.  i mean, i wrote this one night when i was stoned beyond beleif.  quite some time ago, as well.  so if you find it to suck, or be weird, or whatever, just keep in mind, i was stoned:

"my gawd, i hate this stuff." i said to here.
she agreed with me.  she knew what the food was like.  she ate it too.  she had to.  if you did not eat, they would take you away.  you usually did not come back, either.  i do not know what their problem is if you do not eat.  if you are not hungry, you will not eat.  it is a natural thing.  it is instinctual to eat only when you are hungry.
i heard once that they were putting poison in the food.  that they were trying to kill us all.  that they only wanted us for slavery, a mind controll experiment gone totally wrong.  i asked her about it once.  she said that it was not poison, but rather it was medicine.  to help us.  she was always so trusting of people.  especially strangers.  she bleived that if they did not know you, then they had no reason to hurt you.  for a while, i agreed with her.  but then more of us were starting to leave.  we stopped eating and they caught us. they took us away.  and we never came back.  that is why i always eat.  i do not want to disapear.  but she says that they do not disapear.  they just go somewhere else then us.  i do not beleive her anymore.  we are friends, but sometimes i wonder if she really is one of them or not.
"why do they always give us pie?  i always ask for cake.  especially on my birthday.  but they never give me any cake."
she says that it is because it is not my birthday.  how would she know?  she is really starting to piss me off.  the whole time that i have been here, i have been good.  nice.  i have not hurt anyone.  but when i do, i swear she will be the first.
but then i suppose that she does not meen to annoy me.  she id, after all, crazy.  she does not know she is doing it.  she just thinks that shes helping.
"i dont like pie" i say.
she says this pie is good.  it helps you get better.  she really thinks that they put medicine in the food.  but why would i need medicine?  i am not sick.  i am telling you, the girl is crazy.

ok, there you go.  the first contribution to my writing collective.  awful, isnt it?

just to let all of you stalkers know, this is not my little diary thing.  this is a collective of my writings.  ok?  good.  now, i will contribute to this site everytime i come up with something new, okey doke?  okey doo.

-the one who'd give you anything you'll ever want, but you never even thought about...[insert sad face here]